Brunei thoughts: weak and wicked side

Since sec sch, my CCA teacher had told me that hardship with show one's true character and personality. One good way is to go for trips which take you out from your comfort zone. Had expected to see people showing their true self during the JCC.

Out for the 3 navex, navex 2 is the most tedious. Why? Imagine after 3 days of navex 1, shag out to obtain just a passing mark. If navex 1 is to shag us out, then navex 2 is to disintegrate us! Having to scale 3 high hills (including the X no. of hidden knolls) within 2 days and meeting the 1500 H hour just to pass.

During the day, you can see those who are tiring, dragging their legs behind and taking any opportunity to rest. Its quite understandable for this behaviour. The ugly side of us took over when sky darken and we started to harbour. Everyone wanna get into their minimum comfort zone, do nothing.

Harbouring may seems to be the easiest, but still takes the effort of the whole team. Clearing of the dead fall and vegetation, collecting of fire wood and setting up of shelter, 7 people would be struggling to get all these done consecutively. One of my team mate known for his knee injury, always require constant 'reminder' in order for him to move his ass. Once things are done, he will just sit at his position (usually near the fire place) and not move a inch. Will shows his frustrated face when asked to move and grumble that we 'should have' done this and that.

Trying hard to hold my nerves together, calm myself and with patience explaining what our team team gonna do in this tough situation. In fact i offered to help him warm up his rations, on the other hand ask him to share 'some' of his ration with me as sweeteners.. haha!

Throughout the whole 9 days, my IC, Afandi and I are always in the same team. Been thought all the thick and thin together, carrying the signal sets and group equipments, even slept on the same A-frame shelter for 3 days. There is one night during the navex 2, he told me that he wanna give up due to a fall on his ribs, to me it just a reason that he had gave in to the tough situation. Climbing up Mt Biang alone i think had took away almost all of his burning enthusiasm. However, a simple encouragement from our wing comd had motivated he to continue with his survival phase, and lastly made it to the camp first.

Finally to say about myself during the JCC. As mention in previous post that I'm disappointed that i threw my temper on my injured team mate. I known that a person's true character or should i say 'survival instinct' is ugly. I never like to see myself behaving this way. Hence always calm myself down before giving any comment, use positive and optimistic words. Being a Mr Nice Guy in such environment is very challenging. Had felt that i had a good reputation in the Wing for "Mr Nice Guy' don't wish to have this image shattered due to factors which i can influence e.g fatigue. Always telling myself that i can lose to everyone but not my wicked side.

Molted
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